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Thursday, April 20, 2017

Diary not drinking alcohol 8rd day

I am getting better sleep quality.
I can concentrate 30 minutes of meditation in the morning feeling pleasantly and I feel that serotonin is enough in the brain.
When my abstinence period becomes longer, it seems that the exhilaration feeling after zen meditation is gradually increasing.

I have been sleeping for about five hours, and waking up is gradually getting better.
I do not feel tired like in the day in the daytime, but I am feeling better without having to take a nap at work.

I was able to enjoy the meditation of Zen meditation before dinner.I
 have delicious ice cream and chocolate to eat after bathing.
I had delicious cold milk before going to bed.

Diary not drinking alcohol 7rd day

Last night I woke up for the second time but I slept well.
I get up twice in the toilet the night I drink alcohol, but without having alcohol I rarely get up on the toilet.

I got up at 6 o'clock in the morning and meditated for zazen today.
I have a very good mental state during the day, there is no depression symptoms.
I think alcohol will completely escape from my body once I abstain from a week.
The feeling of my heart is a sense I can not taste without abstinence.
And I was lucky to be alive, I suddenly come up to my heart as happy.
When I feel the comfort of living, I would like to increase my abstinence more and more.

I have no symptoms disappeared from my alcohol and my eyes feel very good.
I am happy that the exciting feeling of my teens can be felt this year.

Sunday, April 2, 2017

Diary not drinking alcohol 6rd day

I got a refreshing awakening in the morning.
I get up at six in the morning and meditate on the meditation of the Zazen and feel good.

It is not because a person who depends on alcohol drinks from the morning is physical suffering that alcohol runs out, hands tremble, eyes shabo-shako, sweating.
Because it makes me mentally painful, I want to avoid it.
If I drink a bottle of alcohol I will not be able to stop drinking because you will not suffer.

But instead of alcohol, Zazen meditation reduces its painful mental state.Such a wonderful thing is definitely equipped for the human body.

Saturday, April 1, 2017

Diary not drinking alcohol 5rd day

I slept well last night.
Did I sleep for about 4 hours.

Milk that I drank before going to bed might have been good.
I think that milk has an effect to calm the soul.
I decided to drink milk before going to bed.

I see that person with insomnia is writing the pain of not being able to sleep on the net, but in my case it is not so spicy.
I think sleeping time of 1 day may be enough for 4 hours.
I think that if I use 18 hours a day happens effectively I can use a good life, but I do not know what to use.

I recently breathed abdominal while sleeping when I can not fall asleep, but that may also have a positive effect on the body with insufficient sleep.

Friday, March 31, 2017

Diary not drinking alcohol 4rd day

Also, I could hardly sleep like last night.
It is painful not to get to sleep, but it will be a little confident that even a few hours of sleep can somehow accomplish daytime work.

Even though I can only sleep for a short time, I am better than the depressed state next morning when I drank alcohol.

Zazen meditation has a function to compensate for lack of sleep.
And it will be possible to work even for a short sleep.

I have been wanting to eat sweet food since last night and I bought a lot of ice cream and almond chocolate today.
I think it is cheap to think that it cost more than $10 for drinking alcohol every day.
I was using more than $500 a month when I added money to drink alcohol outside and alcohol that I drink at home.

Now I do not spend money on alcohol, so I decide to buy whatever I want to buy.
It is a reward for myself who does not drink alcohol.
Such a thing is necessary reward in order not to drink alcohol.

After bathing, I had ice cream and cold milk delicious.

Thursday, March 30, 2017

Diary not drinking alcohol 3rd day

I can not sleep at night as usual.
The feeling of dryness of my eyes is the same as yesterday.

I saw something like hallucination in the evening.
It is not like insects are crawling around the wall, as often written on the net.
It looked like a black insect in the corner of my sight, it felt like it disappears when I look at it.
I could not feel fear etc.
I hope I will end with this hallucination.

The degree of my alcohol dependence applies to everything in the check sheet, but it seems like an initial addiction from the view of hallucinations.
I am anxious to return to normal mental condition somehow now.

I have diarrhea in most of the year, but this morning I am not diarrhea.
As usual I have no symptoms of diarrhea if I do not drink alcohol and I feel that nutrition is absorbed from the intestines.

Wednesday, March 29, 2017

Diary not drinking alcohol Day 2

I can hardly sleep at night.
Although I went to bed at 11 pm, I woke up about 5 times and I did not feel a good sleep.
Am I sleeping for about 2 hours in total?
But I am happy because I can sleep for about 15 minutes in the day at work.

I am going to work after eating bread after 30-minute Zazen meditation in the morning.
My eyes are dry and painful.
My hand trembles as a dependency symptom of my alcohol.
And I feel uneasy.

I get struck by the feeling I want to hit something.
I worked quietly so as not to talk to people as much as possible in my workplace.
I felt as if I was yesterday, my sense of insensitivity and despair.

I come back in the evening and do Zazen meditation for 30 minutes.
I got up in the morning, washing my face and meditating the Zazen.
I came home from work and meditated for Zazen before dinner.
In my case I can focus mostly on hungry, I feel as though I'm not sleepy.

I sometimes can not meditate the Zazen because of the physical condition of the day, but do not worry too much so I always try to keep time of 30 minutes per session.

I often do not feel serotonin at all in 15 minutes and it is highly probable that I feel pretty refreshed feeling after 30 minutes.
I am reading to avoid making as much time as possible after dinner.